Movie Review: Charlie’s Angels

PLOT:

Sabina Wilson (Kristen Stewart), Elena Houghlin (Naomi Scott), and Jane Kano (Ella Balinska) are working for the mysterious Charles Townsend (Robert Clotworthy), whose security and investigative agency has expanded internationally. With the world’s smartest, bravest, and most highly trained women all over the globe, there are now teams of Angels guided by multiple Bosleys taking on the toughest jobs everywhere.

REVIEW:

What did I like?

Expansion. Charlie’s Angels has been around since the 70s, but for most people it starts with the 2000 film. Mostly because old TV shows are getting increasingly hard to find. One key aspect expanded on from the 2000s films is that of Bosley. I believe in the show, he was just one guy, but in the films, because they had to replace Bill Murray with Bernie Mac, that became more of a name or position. In this film, it is shown that there are many Bosleys, some are some rather big name personalities, too. I found it interesting that they chose to do this. It served as a sort of connecting point to the other films.

Action. Elizabeth Banks’ only other feature film credit as a director is Pitch Perfect 2. While there were a couple of action scenes in there, nothing was on the scale of this which makes it that much more impressive how great these action segments are. Jumping out of planes, chasing through Istanbul, kicking ass and taking names at a party, it all works splendidly and if she can get over her feminist agenda, she could have a future as an action director, should she so choose.

Twist. I won’t spoil the twist that happens near the end, but I will say that the way things are shown up to that point throws the viewer off the scent, making the reveal much more shocking. So many moves have twists and turns that the audience can see coming from a mile away. It was refreshing to not know what was about to happen for once.

What didn’t I like?

Connection. In the 2000 version, Drew Barrymore, Lucy Liu, and Cameron Diaz had a connection that was almost, if not very sisterly. I have only seen a couple of episodes of the original TV series, but I understand those women were close, as well. These 3…well…I never feel any kind of kinship. Granted, they are just getting together, but they all exist and nothing more. A few times they show some kind of camaraderie, but it feels forced. The connection is what makes the Angels a great team and, conversely, why this version will be forgotten, if they haven’t been already.

Men bad. I had my theories as to why this film was made when I saw the first trailer, but I never thought that any would appear to be true. As I was watching this flick, I noticed that there is not a single redeemable male character. Well, maybe the “hot nerd”, but he’s almost a non character. Every chance this film gets to put women over men, it does. The most insulting of these instances happens near the end when Charlie is “shown”. Instead of man sitting in the char, it is shown to be a woman using a modulator, completely throwing away some 40-50 yrs of lore about the legendary Charlie just for some feminist agenda. The bad guy(s) are all male, as if to say, men bad, women good. I don’t believe there is a single female antagonist or even a henchwoman.

Want over need. Who wanted this? I don’t know of anyone that was screaming for a Charlie’s Angels reboot. The 2000 films are highly entertaining and, while they aren’t the greatest, they are fun action comedies. This is just something that Elizabeth Banks pushed down some Hollywood execs throat to get made, thinking it would be a big hit when, in fact, it broke even, at best. Maybe, and I know this is a foreign concept, perhaps someone should come up with an *GASP* ORIGINAL IDEA!!! I bet that would make beau koo bucks, but studios are too worried about losing money, so they keep recycling and bastardizing old properties. *SIGH*

Final verdict:

What did I think of this version of Charlie’s Angels? It is not a bad film. The girls play their parts. Naomi Scott is gorgeous, likeable, and the bright spot of the film for me. Patrick Stewart sleepwalks his way through this looking older than he does in Logan. Don’t get me started on the photoshop job they do with him at his retirement ceremony (or how they replaced Bill Murray, Bernie Mac, and the guy that played Charlie in the 70s in those pictures). I think if there was some fun to be had in this film, it wouldn’t be so bad but, as it is, this is just an action flick that drags on. Kristen Stewart tries too hard to be funny and likable, but, like the rest of the film, it just doesn’t work. Do I recommend this? No, either watch the 70s show or the 2000s films for your Angel fix.

2 1/2 out of 5 stars