Movie Review: Pearl Harbor

PLOT:

Pearl Harbor is a classic tale of romance set during a war that complicates everything. It all starts when childhood friends Rafe and Danny become Army Air Corps pilots and meet Evelyn, a Navy nurse. Rafe falls head over heels and he and Evelyn and Rafe hook up. Then Rafe volunteers to go fight in Britain, and Evelyn and Danny get transferred to Pearl Harbor. While Rafe is off fighting, suddenly one morning comes the air raid we now know as “Pearl Harbor.”

REVIEW:

What did I like?

Action. Say what you will about Michael Bay, he knows two things, action and beautiful women. I’ll get to the ladies a little later, but good googly moogly are these action scenes beautiful, particularly the titular attack. Bay does a great job of showing not only the CG expulsions, but also some practical ones, as well. The dogfight in the air is also something special, but being an Air Force brat, I’m a little biased. I do wish we could have seen some naval battles besides the bombing of carriers and the men going down with the ship, but that’s a personal preference and not a knock against the film.

Casualties of war. War is hell! While this film is far from the realism one can see in a film such as Saving Private Ryan, there are times when you feel the weight of what is going on. First, the first hour or so of the film is the calm before the storm, if you will. Every time we see the hospital, it is empty, save for one or two patients getting checked out. The floors and sheets are pristine and the windows are open with air flowing like its an air freshener commercial. Then the bombing happens and all hell breaks loose. No longer do we see this bright center of bliss, but rather a dark, blood soaked vision of horror. That is nothing compared to the scene where the men are stuck in the USS Arizona. As people are valiantly trying to get open it up and get them out before it downs, a couple of hands pop out. As the water completely consumes the compartment, we see these men leave this mortal coil. It is quite the sad sight. For those that enjoy seeing more suffering, earlier on it is shown these same men get stuck in the overturned ship. All this really shows how even though WWII is glamourized, this was a war and not fun!

Inspirational propaganda. FDR was probably the greatest wartime president this country has had. The man was a living inspiration, of that there is no arguing. There are a couple of scenes that are more legend than fact, particularly when he is talking to a defeatist room of military advisers. For those not familiar, Roosevelt was stricken with a case of polio and it confined him to a wheelchair. As each of these advisors are giving cowardly excuses for why the US should not retaliate against the Japanese, FDR backs up, locks the wheels of his chair and stands up, telling the room to “not tell what he can or can’t do [sic]”. It is obvious cinematic drama, but it works to really get the cause going. One can only wonder had he done that for real what the result would have been.

What didn’t I like?

Love and war. There are 2 major plotlines in this picture. One is the war effort, obviously, but the other is a love story. Now, alot of WWII stories and portrayals seem to be romanticized, but this one really takes the cake. I don’t really have an issue with the love stuff until it becomes a triangle complete with Ben Affleck’s character coming back from the dead, the pregnancy of Kate Beckinsale’s character, and the convenience of the bombing. This was just too much drama for me, not to mention it takes up way too much time. Cutting some of this out would drastically reduce the runtime of this nearly 3 hour film.

Attack on Cuba. I wasn’t going to bring this up, but when we meet Cuba Gooding. Jr.’s character he is competing in a boxing match. Quite noticeable is that he’s a light skinned man and all the other African American sailors are very dark skinned. Maybe that was coincidence, maybe it was done for a visual effect so that Cuba could stand out. I do not know. What I do know is that the film goes out of its way to let us know that Cuba’s character is more than a cook, only for him to have once scene where he does something (shooting down a plan with the ship’s gun) and that’s it. It appears that his character was a real person, which makes this “portrayal” even worse! Fret not, though Gooding had already played a historical Naval officer before this film and had the whole film (Men of Honor) to respectfully portray him.

Pretty nurses. Earlier I mention Bay’s penchant for casting beautiful women. There is no shortage of that here with Kate Beckinsale, Jamie King, Jennifer Garner, Sara Rue, and others. What is my issue with these women? Beckinsale is one the 3 main characters alongside Ben Affleck and Josh Hartnett. Jamie King gets a small subplot with her dating and getting engaged to one of military boys before he meets an unfortunate end during the bombing. Jennifer Garner seems to be the comic relief, as well as the sensitive one, but she doesn’t seem to have much to do, which is really what can be said for all of them. Sure, we see them saving lives in the latter half of the film, but for the rest of the time, they are just (extremely) pretty faces. Nothing wrong with a little eye candy, but they should have something to do, especially if they have a profession where they are needed!

Final verdict:

What did I think of Pearl Harbor? This is not the film for you to watch if you are looking to write a paper on the attack. There are numerous historical inaccuracies. However, this is a fun film to watch, regardless. Bay is a masterful director when it comes to action and he has a hard on for the military, so this is right up his alley. For some reason, this film gets a lot of hate and I still do not know why. Action, drama, beautiful ladies, a swingin’ soundtrack…what more could you ask for? I highly recommend you check it out, particularly this Memorial Day weekend!

4 out of 5 stars

Movie Review: American Pie Presents: Girls’ Rules

PLOT:

It’s Senior year at East Great Falls. Annie, Kayla, Michelle, and Stephanie decide to harness their girl power and band together to get what they want their last year of high school.

REVIEW:

What did I like?

Continuity. This is the 9th film in the American Pie franchise. From the outside, it doesn’t resemble the other films, other than it is a sex comedy, but if you look closely, there a little Easter eggs that remind you this is in a continuation of the universe. Starting with one of the main characters Stephanie Stifler, a Tall Oaks band camp flag in someone’s room, lacrosse team, etc. The only thing missing was Jim’s dad.

Sara smile. Most of the roles I’ve seen Sara Rue in have her as a sweetheart. This was a bit of a departure for her. She’s still unbelievably likable, but also a complete nympho. No, she isn’t as bad as the quartet of girls that the film centers around, but it is obvious she has a voracious, insatiable sexual appetite. Hell, we meet her in a sex shop giving advice to two of the girls on what product to buy!!!

Let’s talk about sex. A common misconception is that only boys talk about sex. Make no mistake, females are just as dirty as the boys when it comes to the topic. If they weren’t, we wouldn’t have pornstars, right? I don’t think this film went as far as the original films. As a matter of fact, I would have liked it better if they pushed those limits a bit further, but #metoo, I suppose.

What didn’t I like?

Like. Of the four main characters, 1 is lovable, 1 is likable, 1 is deplorable, and the final one is…well, she’s a Stifler. If you’re familiar with this franchise, you know what to expect from her. That doesn’t excuse why the others aren’t immediately endearing. I’m not saying these girls need to be sugar and spice and everything nice, but the viewer doesn’t need to despise them. Aside from the “nice” girls, there is one that hacks her boyfriend’s phone, sneaks into a boy’s room at a party and takes pictures on his bed in his lacrosse uniform. Even with her “redemption” at film’s end, I couldn’t bring myself to care.

Predictable. Once all the characters, conflicts, and plotlines were setup, it is more than obvious what is going to happen. If you’re expecting a surprise, don’t get your hopes up because everything plays out the way you think it will. One can literally tell when things are going to happen, it is so predictable.

Why, just why? I was under the impression that this franchise ended with American Reunion, but I guess the studio wanted to squeeze whatever was left out of this franchise. I have to question the decision, though. No one asked for this and from what I’ve heard and read…well, that pie has gone rancid.

Final verdict:

Final thoughts on American Pie Presents: Girls’ Rules? I don’t really have much to say about this. The magic that made this franchise work originally, is either gone or from a bygone era. The filmmakers try to recapture that formula with female protagonists and I commend them for not making a big girl power thing, this thing was dead on arrival. One would be better served finding one of the earlier (superior) films.

2 out of 5 stars